Out of the Dark
Adelaide stood in the middle of the ringed table, looking outwards at the faces of the only people she could trust.
She’d asked Theoderic to call the meeting, and, sure enough, he’d gathered most of the Law within the hour and brought them here to the meeting chamber. Most of the Law that she knew was here: Laszlo and Adamas, Theoderic and Minerva, Obella, Liana and Willam, and even Caliburn was here. The only notable absence was Plum.
‘Tis not like this is new to her, Adelaide told herself. She couldn’t ignore the pang of longing, though, at the woman she loved not being present for this.
Adelaide wore a long, heavy cloak, wrapped around her body. She looked around the table at the gathered faces of her friends and allies. She thought that she should feel nervous, terrified perhaps, but instead she felt surprisingly calm, if still hesitant. She’d made her decision, and this was the entire reason they’d come, after all. It was far too late to back out, now.
Adelaide thought of her experience in the bath earlier, and shuddered. She shoved the thought out of her mind, and took a breath.
“Thank you all,” she began. “For coming, I mean. Um.” She felt her cheeks begin to grow hot. One sentence in and you already stumble over your words? she berated herself. She cleared her throat and started again.
“Thank you for coming. I asked Theoderic to bring you here because I’ve something important to say.” She glanced around the room and was met with confusion from most of the gathered faces. Willam smiled at her eagerly, and Theoderic nodded encouragingly. She met Laszlo’s gaze, and he smiled. Adelaide closed her eyes, and took another long, deep breath.
“I… have thought long and hard on how to say this,” she said, opening her eyes and looking around the room again. “‘Tis a… difficult thing to say, for many reasons. I do not know if there is a right way to do this, so I shall simply do my best.
“You all know me as Brandon Vermillion, Prince-Adept of the Keep. You also know that I fled said Keep, and abandoned my birthright and station for the Law. What you do not know is the full truth of why.”
“Do you not stand for the cause?” Obella asked, still standing near the doorway despite Laszlo’s insistence that she take a seat.
“I do,” Adelaide replied. “I believe in our cause wholeheartedly, and I continue to dedicate myself to the Law.” At Obella’s approving nod, she continued. “But I’ll not pretend that there is naught else.”
Adelaide hesitated. She’d thought this through already, but perhaps… no, this was for the best. She would stick to her plan.
“I suppose,” she said, reaching to the clasp of her cloak. “That I should just show you.”
She undid the clasp and let it fall to the ground at her feet. Underneath, she wore clothes she’d prepared for this—a tight tunic, just low-cut enough to show off her breasts, and a long, flowing skirt. She still wore her faded orange sash, and as the cloak fell she undid her hair and let it flow around her shoulders.
She immediately felt… lighter, somehow, as though a heavy weight had been lifted off of her shoulders. She let out a breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding, and couldn’t resist giving a small half-twirl. The skirt billowed around her, and she practically felt like she could fly.
“I am not Brandon. Not in my heart. I never felt right as him, and so I have decided to be her. My new name is Adelaide, and it is lovely to truly meet you all.” She clutched her skirt and curtsied, and though she’d never done it in public, it felt so much more natural than a bow.
The rest of the room was silent. Adelaide felt the smile fall from her face as she was met with blank stares from most of the crowd. Willam and Laszlo smiled broadly, and Theoderic even had a half-cocked smirk, but the rest of the Law seemed… hesitant.
Obella was silent, her eyes darting back and forth across the room. Minerva seemed calm, as unflappable as ever, and Caliburn looked predictably bored. But Adamas… Adamas regarded Adelaide keenly through his unsettlingly violet eyes, and she shifted uncomfortably.
“I am confused,” Liana said eventually. “So, this woman was pretending to be the Prince-Adept?”
Adelaide shook her head. “No, Liana. Well, sort of, I suppose,” she said with a small laugh. “I am the Prince-Adept. I’ve just decided that I am someone different than the world thought.”
“And one can just spontaneously decide to be someone else now?” Caliburn commented, disinterestedly examining his cuticles.
Adelaide glanced at Theoderic, who met her eyes with a familiar wide and toothy grin.
“Yes,” Adelaide replied, standing a bit straighter. “I shall carve this path for myself because it is who I am.”
The room was silent for a moment. Caliburn finally met Adelaide’s eyes, and Adelaide smiled with more confidence than she felt. Eventually, Caliburn nodded, and there was a strange measure of approval in his eyes.
“I suppose I’ll not begrudge you that,” Liana commented from around the table. “Though, how did you…” Her eyes trailed downwards towards Adelaide’s chest.
Adelaide flushed. “My dawn magic,” she answered. “It lets me change my body as well.”
Liana made an approving sound, and opened her mouth to ask another question.
“I, for one,” Minerva said from across the table, interrupting Liana. “Am glad you feel safe with us.” She stood and stepped into the ringed table, arms outstretched. She took Adelaide in a hug, and Adelaide hesitated only a moment before accepting it.
Minerva leaned in close to speak softly in Adelaide’s ear. “I’ve known about Theoderic for years now,” she whispered. “You are welcome here.” She pulled away from the hug and smiled warmly at Adelaide.
Adelaide felt tears spring to her eyes, but she forced them down, blinking hard. “Thank you,” she whispered back.
Minerva pulled away and gave Adelaide a squeeze on the shoulder. She took her seat again, and Adelaide looked back around the room.
“Um,” she stammered. “I… suppose that is it. Thank you all again,” she finished lamely, feeling a fool.
Most of the Law began filtering out. Adamas, still seated, met Adelaide’s gaze and cocked his head. He smiled at her, and Adelaide felt a chill run down her spine. That man was… unsettling. Adamas stood and left the room, trailing Obella and the rest. To most of the group, this seemed surprisingly unremarkable, and Adelaide heard fragments of idle chatter as the group left.
Willam gave Adelaide an embrace on his way out as well.
“I am proud of you, cousin,” he said, squeezing her tight. Adelaide nodded and squeezed him back.
“Thank you, Willy,” she said, sniffling. Willam smiled, and made his way out.
Caliburn gave her a strange look as he left. Adelaide suspected he would have more to say later, but he left the room without another word.
Before long, Adelaide was left alone in the meeting room with Laszlo and Theoderic. The two men glanced at each other, and Theoderic stood. He stepped into the ring and held out a hand.
“I’m proud of you, lass,” he said. “Well done.”
Adelaide could hold the tears back no longer and felt them spill down her cheeks. She ignored Theoderic’s outstretched hands and threw her arms around him in an embrace.
“Thank you,” she mumbled into his shoulder. “For everything.”
Theoderic chuckled, and this time he returned the embrace. He smelled of smoke and faintly of sweat, and his arms were warm and comforting around Adelaide’s body.
Adelaide sniffled and pulled away. Theoderic kept a hand on her arm for a moment, and then smiled again.
“Of course, Adelaide,” he replied.
Adelaide smiled again and wiped her eyes with her sleeve. Theoderic squeezed her arm one last time and then exited the chamber.
Adelaide was now left alone with Laszlo. He leaned back in his chair at the far end of the table from the entrance into the ring, his fingers steepled in front of him, and regarded Adelaide with an inscrutable expression.
“How do you feel, child?” he asked eventually.
She considered that for a moment. “Lighter,” came her eventual reply. She grinned, and Laszlo smiled back.
“Good,” he replied, sitting up straighter in his chair. “That is good to hear.
“You will always have a place here, Adelaide,” he continued. “And I am sorry that you had to fight so hard to find one.”
Adelaide nodded. “Thank you, Laszlo.”
Laszlo smiled. “Tell me,” he said after a moment. “Do you still have the portrait I drew of you?”
“Of course,” Adelaide replied. “I keep it in my pack for safekeeping.”
“I am glad. I hope it brings you comfort when needed.”
Laszlo fell silent. He continued to look at Adelaide, and she felt that there was something else he wished to say.
“There is much work to be done, child,” Laszlo eventually said softly. “Our work is far from over.”
“I know,” Adelaide replied. “And I feel more ready to face it than ever.”
“I am glad to hear it. However, I must be honest with you. We face more than you know.”
Adelaide’s smile faltered. “What do you mean?”
Laszlo’s smile was unchanged, but his eyes grew distant. “I am afraid that I can not tell you quite yet, child. All in due time, I promise.” His eyes refocused, and he locked his gaze on Adelaide’s.
“I see great promise in you, you know,” he said. “It has taken no small amount of strength and courage for you to reach this point, and I should very much like to see you continue to grow.” His moustache danced as his smile grew.
“I have seen sixty-eight winters. I am not as young as I used to be, Adelaide. I feel my age every moment of every day. Once our mission is complete, the people will need someone to guide them, and I will not live forever.”
Adelaide felt her heart hit the floor. “Laszlo, what are you…”
“I do not ask for a commitment yet, child,” he said. “But I suspect you may one day surpass all of mine own achievements.” He stood, and stepped around the table to Adelaide.
“For now, I merely offer my congratulations.” He stuck out a hand, and this time Adelaide shook it.
“Let us find your future together,” Laszlo said with a smile.
Laszlo excused himself and gave Adelaide a few minutes to regain composure. She spent the time sitting in silence in the meeting room, reflecting.
That had gone… surprisingly well. She had spent months, years even, catastrophizing about what would happen when her secret was revealed. In some ways, that fear had been justified by the actions of her mother, but here, at the Fifth Law, it seemed she could be truly safe.
Adelaide let out a long, deep breath, and then smiled to herself. She’d done it. All of this time, and now she could finally be herself. No more hiding, no more Brandon, just her.
Adelaide stood and made her way to the door. She needed to find Plum and tell her the news-
“Vermillion,” came a voice at the door as she stepped through. “A word?”
Brandon turned to meet Caliburn’s eyes. He unwittingly felt himself fall into the role of the Prince-Adept once again, and felt immediately uncomfortable with his attire. He wished he’d brought the cloak with, and folded his arms to cover his chest.
Caliburn glanced downward as he did so, and rolled his eyes.
“Oh for light’s sake, Vermillion,” he said, his voice dripping with derision. “I’ve no qualm with you being… whatever you are.”
Brandon winced, and forced himself to uncross his arms.
“In fact, I wanted to…” Caliburn hesitated. He opened and closed his mouth a few times, and then scoffed. “I wanted to… I wanted to ask your advice.”
Adelaide was so stunned that she couldn’t help but to drop her facade.
Caliburn is asking me for help? she thought, incredulous.
“My advice?” Adelaide managed to squawk out. “Are you… feeling alright?”
“Yes, very clever,” Caliburn snapped. “Make fun all you like, just…” He hesitated again. “How did you do it?”
“As I said, my dawn magic-”
“Not that,” Caliburn interrupted. “Not the magic. ‘Tis just… are you not afraid of what people will say? How they will treat you?”
Adelaide grimaced. “Of course I am,” she answered. “I was disowned by my own mother for this, Caliburn.”
“Then how did you find the will?”
Adelaide blinked at his words. His voice was strained, his brow furrowed, and he refused to meet her eyes. He seemed genuinely pained, and—perhaps even more so—confused.
Adelaide sighed and leaned against the wall. She crossed her arms again, though this time it wasn’t to hide.
“‘Twas… not easy, I’ll not lie. My mother found out against my desires and it ruined what fragments of a life I still had at the Keep. I’ll not pretend I did not feel anxiety that the same would happen here.
“Living as Brandon, pretending that all was well, was killing me, Caliburn.” Adelaide clutched at her wrist before continuing. “I could not keep going like that, hiding myself and pretending to be someone that I knew, deep down, is not me. ‘Twas this, or…” she trailed off, leaving the end unspoken.
“And I did not do this alone,” she continued after a moment. “I’ve had some truly wonderful people with me. Plum, Willy, Theoderic and Laszlo… their support has given me the strength that I needed to defy my fears.”
Even as she said the words, Adelaide was surprised by how true it was. That support meant the world to her. Plum had, quite literally, saved her life—in more ways than one. She smiled fondly, and hesitantly put a hand on Caliburn’s shoulder.
“We are not alone, Caliburn,” she said softly. He glanced at her hand, and for a moment, Adelaide saw through his snark and pride. Caliburn was afraid.
He scoffed and jerked his shoulder away. “Of course not,” he snapped. “I’ve plenty of people.”
He spun on his heel and took a few steps away, then paused.
“Thank you,” he said, almost quietly enough that Adelaide couldn’t hear, and then stalked off down the hall.
Adelaide shook her head as he turned the corner. I shall never understand him, she thought, and then turned to go speak to Plum.
Adelaide nudged Plum awake. Plum’s eyes fluttered open, and she sleepily grabbed Adelaide’s arm and pulled her into bed. Adelaide squeaked, but wrapped her arms around Plum in return.
After a few moments, Adelaide pulled away and sat up. Plum grumbled, and Adelaide smoothed her hair, watching her fondly.
Plum pushed herself upright too, and the blankets slipped down off of her shoulder. She’d gone to bed in her traveling clothes, but at some point she’d shed most of them. She now wore just her underclothes, and Adelaide couldn’t help but let her eyes wander.
Plum hummed and rubbed her eyes before meeting Adelaide’s gaze again. “Hello, love,” she mumbled. “How long have I been asleep?”
“Just a few hours,” Adelaide replied softly, forcing herself to look at Plum’s eyes again. “I have news.”
“Oh?” Plum asked, raising an eyebrow. She rested her hand on Adelaide’s thigh, and Adelaide felt her heart beat a touch faster.
Adelaide grinned. “I did it, Plum,” she said, giving her hand a squeeze. “I finally did it.”
“Did what, love?”
“I told everyone my secret. I no longer have to hide! They can all finally know Adelaide!” She beamed, and felt herself bouncing up and down excitedly.
Plum, though, only furrowed her brow.
“How did it go?” she asked.
Adelaide stilled, and her face fell. “I…” she hesitated. “It went well. There were some questions, but it seemed alright. Caliburn even asked for my advice after, which…” she trailed off as Plum’s brow knitted further.
“What is wrong, Plum?” she asked.
Plum opened and closed her mouth a few times. She took a breath, and met Adelaide’s eyes. All of her earlier hesitation had vanished, and she met Adelaide’s eyes with one of her dazzling smiles.
“Nothing, love,” she said, squeezing Adelaide’s hand. “I am so happy for you, Addie.”
It was Adelaide’s turn to be concerned. “Plum, do not lie to me,” she pleaded.
“I am not lying, love. Everything is fine.”
“Plum, you can talk to me.”
“I would if there was a problem, Adelaide.”
“There clearly is a problem, though.”
“No, there is not.”
“Plum-”
“Will you quit telling me how I feel?” Plum snapped, and Adelaide flinched at the sudden anger in her voice. Plum’s gaze immediately softened.
“I am sorry, love,” Plum said. “I did not mean to yell.” She pushed herself up off the bed and stepped over to the dresser where she’d left her clothes.
“I think I am going to go for a walk,” she said, rummaging for acceptable clothes.
“Plum-”
“I am fine, Adelaide,” she interrupted. “I just… need some fresh air.”
“Do you want some company?” Adelaide asked.
Plum shook her head. “I shall be fine, thank you.”
Adelaide fell silent as Plum dressed. She fidgeted with the sheets, twisting them around and around in her hands. She pulled it taut around one of her fingers and held it there until the tip of her finger turned red, and then white.
Adelaide jumped as Plum put a hand on her shoulder.
“I am happy for you, love,” Plum said. “Truly. I just… I need to think about something.”
Adelaide nodded mutely. Plum opened her mouth as if to say something else, but then stopped herself. She turned and left without another word, and Adelaide was left alone in the dark, empty room.
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