Right Now

My brain won’t let me not think of you.

After it all, after everything you knew,

you still gave up on me

like it never meant anything to you.


I dreamed of you last night and I think

that I would take you back if you asked,

even though I could never trust you

not to break me again.

You were my light in the dark,

you were my shield against the fear.

But now you’re gone,

it’s over before I could blink.

I loved you so much and I probably still do,

but right now I know that I miss you.


I would’ve tried to make it work

but you never even gave me the chance,

how could you do that to me?

You didn’t even try,

and now I don’t know

if I’ll ever even see you again

but right now I know that I miss you.


You know what’s fucked up?

I’m blaming myself.

What if I’d just been better?

What if I’d fixed it for us?

But what if you’d talked,

what if you’d stayed,

what if you’d let me try?


You promised me,

time and again

that you would be there for me.

Did you ever mean it at all?


Did you ever love me at all?

Or am I just that easy to give up on?

I always feared

that you loved each other more

and I guess I was right

or else we wouldn’t be here.


I would have broken the world for us,

but instead I ended up broken.

I don’t know how I’ll be okay,

I don’t know what to do,

but right now I know that I miss you.

2 responses to “Right Now”

  1. Sad but beautiful. Flowing and tantalizing. Great poem

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Thank you very much. I’ve been digging deeper into the poetry lately. It’s been a rough couple of weeks.

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